Need I say more?!

I was 2nd row at this show, July 24, 2006, The Gorge in George, Washington. Pearl Jam in all their glory. Why post these? Cuz I found them in my photo archives, they bring back great memories and I am (listening) rockin' out to this exact show right now!
(1st= Ed; 2nd=Ed, Jeff, Mike; 3rd= Ed, Jeff, Stone, Matt

the little things

I had a great weekend. It was casually spent hanging with the P's and helping them around the house, I enjoy stuff like that. Took a road trip yesterday to hear a lovely group of people sing about lovely things- very peaceful! Spent a good part of this weekend on the phone chatting with my closest comrades- thanks everyone for the great chats, it's always wonderful to get caught up on life, hear your stories, share mine and make plans for future fun. I spent friday night in- watching the debate...if you weren't already planning on voting for Obama, I hope his responses to friday's questions help you realize he's the only way to go. He is the change this country needs and gives us hope that we will be a strong nation again.
Thank God for John in the morning, he played the best mix of music this morning- to help me ease into a monday. John or JITM as the Seattlites refer to him is incomparable. When I left Seattle I had to deal with three facts: that I would no longer live near water, near Pearl Jam or have KEXP at my disposal. These three things were what I had to reconcile the longest. John is worth sticking around for.
Thank God for Eddie Vedder and his voice, for making my drive to work more tolerable. I tuned into John once at work, but for the approach to work, it was Ed going Into the Wild.
Thank God for Maynard James Keenan and his rockin' vocals.
Happy monday!

Like it was yesterday....more thoughts

I am so glad it's friday, I can't wait to sleep in this weekend. I am also excited for a 30 minute run that I plan to do while at the gym this afternoon. I am going to Kansas City next week. It should be fun because it's for a training and it will be fun to hang out with my "co-workers" plus I get to see my ex-Mark, we have plans for cocktails or dinner and I get to see my old friend Scott and meet his very pregnant wife. Scott and I met at the Sagrada Familia church in Barcelona Spain about 5 years ago. He was going up one of the towers and I was going down. We were inseparable after that for about 3 days. He was the superhero that helped me out with my very badly sprained ankle and he's a great guy to be with while finishing off a few pitchers of Sangria. Anyhoo- KC, been there more than I ever thought I'd have to be.
I am also leaving for Chicago in a few weeks! Good times!
The one hour season premier of The Office didn't disappoint. It was superb. Highlight was Creed dividing up his dried rice with a credit card like it was cocaine. Can't wait for Kath and Kim in a few weeks then 30 Rock in a month!
Sentimental thoughts....well, I warned you, so here I go. It was one year ago today that my brother and I finalized the packing of my boxes and hoisted them into a bright yellow truck ready for a move. We started the morning with breakfast at Coastal Kitchen then I visited my friends at my place of employment, then we got busy. It was a weird day because I allowed myself not to really think too hard about what I was doing, I had already had every thought there was to have. I was ready. We played the music loud and got done earlier than expected with partial help from Mr Magic- Blake! After we got the truck secured with just a few things to pack up, we headed down to my all time favorite Seattle bar called the Cha Cha, I only take my most favorite people there. We had more than enough drinks to numb whatever feelings might be present. Then walked down the hill to attend the first showing of the movie Into the Wild. A beautiful movie by Sean Penn and a movie that couldn't have been more fitting for me and what I was embarking on. I bawled through the end of the movie and by the time we left the theatre it was a full on cry fest. My bro did his best to talk me through it. At that point the tears were about what was finally hitting me (and of course my sentimentality) realizing that was my last night in Seattle. It was slightly traumatic but not really. We walked up the hill one last time and headed home because we still had some stuff to do for the morning's departure.
I still remember all the reasons why, after 10 years, I left that city. Change, priorities, new challenges, those are all still present but it doesn't take away the feelings of missing it or wanting parts of it back. See my other posts to understand that (limbo-ness that is my life right now).
Back at my apartment I made a few phone calls to friends that left me teary voicemails, I couldn't deal with seeing them then, in the state that I was in. I just left it as "see you soon". They understood. Then me and my bro ended that night, my last night, much the way we ended my first night in Seattle, laying on the floor of my apartment with only blankets beneath us, watching tv, dreading and anticipating the next morning and pondering the journey ahead. It was exciting, it was scary, I was happy, I was sad, I was ready, I was oddly enough content, and I was glad my bro was right next to me during all of it.
There may be more thoughts on this, then again, sentimentality aside, I am not one to really dwell on the past except to remember it fondly. But I knew this day would come and I knew I, in my own way, would have to deal with it the way I need to by reflecting on it. Like I have said for years now, you can take Lisa out of Seattle but you can't take Seattle out of Lisa.
A year later- wow, parts of my life are very different and parts are still very much the same. It's the collective human experience I guess. C Jane Run spoke very eloquently about it on her blog today and I could relate to most of what she said- life what is it, why is it etc. ?
for now all I can say is-
I miss you Seattle, but I love the person you made me become.

Love Need Love Want Love

Sentimentality

You have to work with me here a bit...if you know me well then you know I am extremely sentimental. I'll celebrate anniversaries of things in the past that most people wouldn't care about or even remember. It's how I am and how I've always been. With that said, the next few weeks, maybe 4-6 to be exact, hold many "anniversaries" and reflections for me that no doubt you will be reading about because I'll want to share them with someone. Your patience is appreciated!

Scary thoughts

I was laughing about the fact that I know all the words to Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg's radio play songs. I also know all the words to Ice Cube's "today was a good day". That's odd coming from me since I can also outsing George Michael and Eddie Vedder, meaning, seeing them live, I sing every word they sing..all the right oohhs and ahhhs and everything in between. But the Dre and snoop and Cube....that's scary! It also scares how into blog-surfing I am. Yikes. I am also bothered by how much I like candy corn and those little pumpkins...no shame there. I could write about my fears re: the upcoming election, McCain, Palin etc...but remember not a political blog. So instead I'll share a fun story with you. This is a story about a guy called Mike McCready who plays lead guitar for a band called Pearl Jam.
I attended a show years ago now, in Seattle at a small venue called the Sunset Tavern (my favorite place to see a show). I was there with a good friend who decided to busy herself trying to get in good with the headlining band. One of the guys in the headlining band was a good friend of mine. His name is Rick. During the course of the pre-show activities---sizing up the crowd, ordering drinks, securing good viewing etc.-- I found myself doing these things alone since she was occupied. This nerd band dude who was in the opening band kept talking to me, wanting to buy me drinks, annoying me, basically he wouldn't let it rest. I was completely annoyed because he was invading my show space. So, I said to my friend Rick, hey, nerd guy is annoying tell him to leave me alone. Rick did and the dude didn't. Rick checked in again and I said he is still annoying me, Rick said alright, problem solved come with me. He led me to a table and who was sitting there, none other than Mike McCready, the lead guitarist for my ever-favorite band, PJ. Rick introduced us and explained the situation to Mike. Mike turned to me and said "I will be your body guard Lisa, just stick by me all night". (in sort of a dramatic way) I'm not sure if I moved at this point or could talk. But I gathered myself together and carried on. He invited me to sit down, then said no, let's go get drinks. He's in recovery so I didn't drink either, we both ordered cranberry juice. He asked all about me, what I did (grad student), what I studied and why? What neighoborhood I lived in? etc. Then I asked him and here's how it went:
Lisa: so Mike what do you do?
Mike: Umm, I play guitar
Lisa: Oh really, do you play in a local band?
Mike: Yeah you could say that, hee hee
Lisa: That's cool, there is some great music around here.
Mike: yeah, good scene- we like how the scene has treated us so far.
Lisa: Gosh, well, I hope your band does well with all the music out there
Mike: yeah we do pretty well for ourselves, so Lisa what types of music do you listen to?
Lisa: Oh wow, Pearl Jam is just my most favorite band.
Mike: silence- stares at me, Ummm, Lis, you are a total smart ass..
hee hee
Here's me, joking with Mike from f_cking Pearl Jam. Anyhoo- the night carried on in much of the same way. We hung out, he bought me drinks, he checked in on me while I was rocking out. He assured me that if anyone bothered me I could sit with him and just to let him know if anyone was bothering me.
Well, end of night-post show activities were on. Where would we go next, it was 3 am, should we go anywhere? Mike stopped by back stage where we were and said his goodbyes to Rick and the band. Then to me. A hug, a kiss and a good night. I followed it up by saying "hey, Mike thanks for being my body guard tonight and letting me hang with you". He said "Lisa, I'd guard your body anytime and it was a joy to get to know you", then a wink and he was off. Now I've gotten to know the PJ guys over the course of the years but this is one of my favorite PJ guy moments. It was on my mind, wanted to share it!
Have a good day!

A fine example of the corrupt justice system

I read that Damien Echol's writ of habeas corpus has been denied. Shocking! Denied by a backwood, good ole boy judge who doesn't know any better. Jason and Jesse's trials continue but Damien was shut out.
I see the corruption, us supporters of these dudes all see it. The powers that be are scared $hitless by their own wrong-doing. All evidence of guilt points to the stepfather of one of the young victims. Yet, Jason, Damien and Jesse sit in prison with no hope in site. Disgusting!
Oh and if you don't know what I'm talking about go here http://www.wm3.org/ -while there, why not donate to their legal funds? You too can check out the movie Paradise Lost - a detailed documentary about the murders at Robinhood Hills. It will really outrage you.
Thanks!

Losing ego, gaining self

A quick follow up to my previous post- as you can see/read and if you know me well, then you know my journey lately. The limbo-ness of everything. A few things to add- I have to address the fact that spiritually I have been on a journey of epic proportions and it has been fantastic. Going deeper in myself and realizing the depths of my relationship with the Spirit...truly amazing and I'm truly grateful for this quiet time to do this further exploring. It's always enlightening to go through the dark forest, and come out the other side to the light- a much better person. Now I spent 10 years on my own so this type of journey isn't new to me, it's quite familiar and always welcomed. I have ventured this path of searching and seeking many times, always knowing who's with me and always better for it. It's golden. And I realize, like I didn't already know, that I'm still top of my game- that hasn't changed at all!

ps. thanks for the all the fun comments I've received via email. I wouldn't want to open up yet another email address either (but did for this blog). I love reading your thoughts as well and appreciate you reading mine. special love to my seattle people- you know who you are and you know you are loved by moi!

Homecoming

So much of the past year for me has been about finding my grounding again. I left my home of Seattle, after 10 years, right when I was at the top of my game. I had a fantastic job where I was taken care of very well, I had a lovely apartment that allowed me to feel safe and cozy. I lived in a neighborhood where I loved to be any given time of the day, I knew my neighbors, they'd say hello and chit chat with me. I had friends that called on me all hours of the day and visited me and made plans with me to shop, drink lattes, drink wine, go to shows, take walks, do nothing at all, laugh etc. Then I left.
I left for so many reasons, one being that I really felt the need to be closer to my family again. We are all getting older and I felt that I was missing out on things that I should not have been missing out on. The little celebrations of life, the big moments of life, the day to day moments of life...I was having them on my own in Seattle while everyone else was having them here in AZ. I missed that.
Leaving wasn't difficult, it's looking back at how good I had it that is difficult. Not that I didn't realize how good I had it and of course I was grateful for everything I did have! I think it's the looking back that I've been doing lately only because the present is so unsettling or non-grounding. Looking for that right and better-fitting job that I desire, making my own friends who share my common interests and aren't married with kids (nothing in common there- of course I love my married mom friends though), trying to meet Mr. Right in huge sea of Mr. Wrongs or Mr. Maybes...not fun. It's all been so confusing, frustrating, unsettling....yet, in those quiet times when I do feel those feelings, somehow hope creeps in. And things feel better- even for a fleeting second.
I am reminded of why I returned when I am called to babysit my excellent nieces and nephew. Or when I get to hang out with my sis in law for a morning of Domestic Bliss shopping. Or planning a happy hour event with my bro or saying hi to my parents each evening, sharing dinner with them, laughing with them, sharing our days together. It might not be Seattle and the kick ass life I had there. But it is love, it is safe, it is home. And in the end, when the job falls into place, when the friends come around, when the right guy is next to me- my family's presence would have been constant through all of that and to me, that is priceless, that is why I came home!

OUTRAGEOUS!

I had no intention of this blog turning into a political wretch fest, but for this second it is. Palin is saying that the war in Iraq is part of God's plan and that the US is just carrying out God's plan. Oh MY GOD! I think my God is the same God that she's referring to and as far as I know my God isn't interested in killing thousands of people for the sake of fossil fuels. My God isn't interested in allowing one country to destroy another in his name. And the vain-ness of her quotes. Like the US Gov't has been specifically called upon by God to carry out a special plan! This is such BS. I hope the rest of the country sees the complete lunacy and ignorance of her whacked-out statements. If she's so pro-life, then how can she be pro-war? This is something that has always made me curious...the pro-life movement, the political platform that honors it are the conservative, right wing, Christians yet they are pro-war= pro-killing. It makes no sense. I wonder if Palin will feel that way if something happened to her son who is headed for Iraq. Will it still be God's plan then?
I'm done with that rant. I am glad that my God loves all of his people unconditionally, no matter what they say. I have to add that I do indeed tremble for my country, and people like Palin and Bush and the rest, when I reflect that my God is a just God!
Thanks for reading!

thoughts du jour

I hope Mr. Obama sweeps this election. I can't handle the thought of him not. I do not like Sara Palin. Helio Sequence is one of my favorite bands and their new CD is one of their best. I just broke up with my boyfriend, so now I'm single again, single at 34...who would have thought? I am a licensed social worker no matter what other states say! I hope the dollar increases in value so I can return to western or eastern Europe in the spring and have money left over. I miss my beloved Seattle and all the good food, friends and fun I had, but not enough to move back. I believe the events that took place on Sept. 11, 2001 were an inside job. Masterminded by a government out to perfect their own agenda (names shall be nameless) for things like oil, money, security. If you are not outraged then you are not paying attention. My nieces and nephew are totally cool and cute. My family is awesome!

Virgin to the blog world...aka the fishbowl

For all you voyeurs- I have decided to create one, we'll see how long the creativity and exhibitionism lasts. Stay tuned...